All or Nothing: The NBA can’t afford another lockout-shortened season

           We’re in Day 18 of the NBA’s second lockout in 13 years.  While the millionaires continue to stare down the billionaires over revenue percentages and tricky accounting (as evidenced by the exchange between the New York Times and the NBA), there’s one option that needs to be taken off the table: the shortened season. Why is no season better than a shortened season? I present Exhibit Zzzzzz: the San Antonio Spurs.

           The last lockout resulted in a 50-game season that saw the San Antonio Spurs win its first championship in franchise history. The effect that title had on the Spurs and the NBA was both surreal and catastrophic, respectively.

 What people don’t remember, due to time and the Boston Celtics Big 3, is winning a championship is a process. And losing is a big part of that process. Some teams never even get past the losing. They never catch a break and never hoist the O’Brien.

I’m a Suns fan, I know these things. Jazz and Pacers fans know it. Even though they won’t admit it because of a couple of titles they sandwiched in between afros and Watergate, Knicks fans know it, too.

Executive Director of the NBPA Billy Hunter and NBA Commish David Stern during happier times. If this scene doesn't happen again, and soon, a half-season shouldn't be an option.

The lockout-shortened season gave the Spurs a shortcut to a title. They’re the only champions that didn’t play a complete season. A long, arduous season of trials and challenges. The Spurs got to skip 32 spaces in reaching the mountaintop.

Winning a championship gives you something. A swagger. An x-factor. A certain confidence (and perhaps a whistle or two in your favor). The Spurs got all of those things, and got them at a special, discounted, asterisk price. The small-market, shortcut champs went on to win 4 championships in 9 seasons, never repeating as champions. And nearly ruined the league in the process.

From 2002-2010, the San Antonio Spurs played in each of the least-viewed NBA Finals series in that 8-year span, reaching rock bottom when the 2006-07 Spurs versus Cavaliers series drew a 6.2 average – the lowest in NBA Finals history — a full eight seasons after the lockout.

The game’s popularity was low, in part, because the Spurs just weren’t entertaining. They never have been. They aren’t engaging. . Tim Duncan is so bland he makes shashimi seemed over-seasoned. There’s nothing that makes you want to cheer them or jeer them (unless they beat your team en route to a title). No one cares about the Spurs, and the NBA paid for that. At least people love to hate the Miami Heat.

The hate-able Heat and the journeymen Mavericks have all but restored the NBA to Jordan-era dramatics. The only thing better would have been if the aligning stars and Western Arms Race would have resulted in a Lakers vs. Heat NBA Finals, but the Mavericks became the underdog that some people actually loved once they charmed the Mamba and his band of character actors.

It was the most-viewed NBA Finals ever on ABC, with Game 6 drawing a 15.0 rating. But this transition from rocking out to locking out could have horrible effects if there’s a shortened season, mainly because of a stoic star player on boring, small-market team, waiting to take advantage of a potentially shortened season.

No, not the San Antonio Spurs. I’m talking about Kevin Durant (the most prosaic premier player since...Tim Duncan) and the Oklahoma City Thunder. 

See, I think the Thunder are destined to be one of those teams. The one that always competes, but never wins. The one that suffers a major injury in what was supposed to be “their year.” The one that sees its star player suspended in a playoff game for leaving the bench. The one that just can’t get past that great player standing in the way.

Duncan is passing his fireless torch to Kevin Durant. And that could be very, very bad if the NBA plays a shortened season.

However, if they get the shortcut, they may be able to. If Russell Westbrook doesn’t have 82 games to implode. If Kendrick Perkins doesn’t have time to break down. If James Harden doesn’t get a chance to get into and out of a slump. If they never have to do those things, they might topple the older Mavericks, L.A. Lacklusters, and evil Heat and become a perennial powerhouse.

Phil Jackson famously remarked that the Spurs ”needed an asterisk next to their championship.” Spurs fans were outraged. So outraged that years later, they stopped buying tickets to playoff games. It’s true. The Spurs are the only championship-caliber team that I’ve ever seen that doesn’t always sell out playoff games.

Should the Oklahoma City Thunder win an asterisk championship, the NBA might very well dip back into Spurs-era ratings. The Heat, Lakers, and maybe another team will be able to sneak a ring or three in on them, but they’ll be around just long enough to annoy fans and keep them from fully committing to the NBA, season in and season out.

This summer, as the players and owners sit at the bargaining table, I hope they remember the season that spawned a manufactured virus of a dynasty that crippled the league for years. They can’t afford to create another one just as they’ve gotten rid of the old one. This is too important.

If they don’t get this right, the revenue they’re arguing over splitting will be a lot lower than it will be if they do. This is high stakes poker, owners and players. Play the full 82 games or don’t play any at all. Bet it all.  Not crowning a champion is better than crowning the wrong one. Don’t believe me, believe the ratings. Read ‘em and weep.

Crazy Nash Myth more Fiction than Fact

Before I go on to prove that I’m crazy, let me state the obvious: Steve Nash is a great player. No other player in the NBA has his skill set and not since John Stockton have we seen a more masterful ball distributor. And by my account, if you throw stats out the window  and use the eyeball test (which I will continue to do throughout), Nash in his prime (2004-2007) looked better than Stockton.

Steve Nash is a great player whose greatness might be holding him — and his teams — back.

But there is one recurring review of the game’s greatest point guard that’s been like nails on a clipboard for me. It's said so often. I’ve watched Nash’s entire career (I’m a Suns fan who lived in Dallas when he played there, so we have a very close relationship), especially his second stint with the Suns, and I drank the purple and orange kool-aide for a while. But not anymore. This dirty misconception has to be brought to the forefront once and for all. These starting five little words will go unscrutinized no longer.

Steve Nash makes people better. 

          That was hard to type and even harder to believe. Sure, it sounds right. So many players have gone to Phoenix and seen their stats inflated. Shooting percentages go up. Points per game get a boost. In reality, those are the only two statistics that players consistently see increase playing Superfriend alongside the 37-year-old Man of Still. Marginal players like Quentin Richardson, James Jones, Leandro Barbosa, Raja Bell, Jared Dudley, Channing Frye, and even Tim Thomas have ridden Steve’s ball-distributing style and the Suns’ high-octane attack to career years and lucrative deals.

But for every Steve Nash success story, there’s a dark side of Planet Orange. Players get to the Valley of the Sun eager to play with Nash and feed off the easy shots. But the truth is, if you have offensive skills outside of catch-and-shoot, you might as well leave those at Sky Harbor International. Playing alongside Nash means you’d better learn to catch and score or you won’t see the floor. The players he “made better” are the ones who adopted and adapted. But what of the players who have skills beyond that? Or the ones who would benefit from developing more than a catch-and-shoot game?

          What about Amare Stoudemire? Steve Nash spoon-fed him. That’s what we thought when he went to New York. But his scoring increased (while his shooting percentage fell 5%) and he got better at avoiding those offensive fouls when he suddenly had to create his own shots more often. He looks better offensively now than in Phoenix, and that’s not easy for a guy who was already averaging over 20 points per.

          How about Shawn Marion? Yes, the only numbers he has haven't dropped are his age and vertical, but his field goal percentage has actually increased, no longer having to knock down corner 3-pointers. And everyone in Phoenix was shocked when they saw him actually scoring the ball in one-on-one situations against the Miami Heat. We all wondered where that was in 2005. Here’s a clue…it was in Nash’s pocket pass.

          Joe Johnson looked great on the floor with Nash, catching-and-shooting to a career-best 48% from three-point range and serving as the primary ball-handler whenever Nash laid in the corner. That’s when we saw glimpses of the real Joe Johnson. The one Atlanta thought was worth a max deal. I, and his stats, still disagree with those contracts, but it’s no question he’s better now than he was in Phoenix.

          Jason and Quentin Richardson both had decent post games before going to Phoenix. Both players’ post games have since gone milk carton. Robin Lopez is wasting precious years of development trying to learn how to play pick-and-roll with Nash. Marcin Gortat will be the next player who could really benefit from developing some type of low-post game, but won’t have the opportunity as long as Nash runs the show.

Even Shaq (admittedly, by that time, watching him play was like listening to Whitney Houston sing – it’s so painful because you know how great they were) gave up his customary low-post positioning and found himself in the situation he could never even defend: the pick-and-roll. Vince Carter expected to see a scoring increase, but you could see his lack of interest in the game when he was no longer asked to dribble. Ever. A second look at Grant Hill will reveal that his numbers his last year in Orlando were basically the same as they are in Phoenix, so Nash has nothing to do with Hill’s extended success. Then there’s the most damning piece of evidence. It’s the German elephant in the room.

Dirk Nowitzki may have had to be separated from Nash to become the champion and Finals MVP he is today.

If Dirk Nowitzki had played his entire career with Steve Nash, he would not have developed into the unstoppable force that just stormed through the NBA playoffs. Dirk showed so much in the Mavericks’ astonishing championship season. Spin moves to the basket. Fadeaways. Back-to-the-basket. Finding the open man out of the double-team. Herr Clutch. What we saw from Dirk was like nothing we’d seen from him, on that big of a stage, ever.  Had Nash stayed in Dallas, Dirk would still be picking-and-popping his way out of the playoffs year after year. That’s just a guess, but how insane of a guess is it?

I love Steve Nash. He’s one of the great things about sports. I can’t think of a reason anyone wouldn’t like him. He’s like the ice cream of the NBA – even the lactose intolerant people who shouldn’t like it find some kinda way to enjoy it. But his greatness at spoon-feeding teammates has been his biggest weakness – a tragic flaw. Since he’s been making the game “easier” for others, none of his teammates have developed a strong enough skill set to help him and his teams get over the top.

It would be great if Nash could somehow work his way to Miami (Heat sign Chalmers and a big like Dalembert and send both to Phoenix?). It would add a couple years to the career of His Agelessness. He would take some of the pressure to create off of LeBron James and Dwyane Wade when necessary. And he’d finally be what he’d relegated other NBA players to becoming: a spot-up shooter.

If you’ve hung in this long, you’re probably convinced I’m nuts. Insane. Off my rocker. Crazy. But right now, you might be questioning your own sanity. In which case, you’ll need treatment. Watch some Suns highlights. After all, Steve Nash makes people better...right?

DEAL FOR MELO TO INCLUDE NOAH?

ESPN is reporting that the Chicago Bulls are "discussing" whether to include Joakim Noah in a deal for Carmelo Anthony. I'll make this easy for them: DO IT.

If it's one thing I know about today's NBA, it's that wing players win titles. The last team to win it all without a player 6'5"-6'8" who could virtually score at will was the anamolous 2004 Pistons (champs include Kobe Bryant, Paul Pierce, Manu Ginobili, Dwyane Wade, and Michael Jordan). Before that, it was Hakeem's Rockets of 1995. And here's the key: Joakim Noah is not The Dream. He's closer to a mirage than a dream.

I understand he sets the tone for the Bulls. He's intense, high-energy, and aggressive. But he also averages 10 points and 10 rebounds. So if you can package a just-barely double-double guy for arguably the best scorer in the NBA, you have to do it. Give Denver whoever else they would want to make it work (outside of Boozer). 

All I know is that if someone has the potential to make me and my darlings in Miami a little nervous, it's the trio of Derrick Rose, Carmelo Anthony, and Carlos Boozer flanked by Kyle Korver, Ronnie Brewer, and whatever bigs they can scrap up to anchor the defense. They could replace Noah's energy with Lou Amundson. They could take a page out of the Heat's playbook and build with role-playing vets who have very specialized skill sets. There are still some intriguing free agents out there.

I like Noah a lot. There literally is not a player in the NBA like him. But I like Carmelo Anthony more. I don't even like Anthony as much as a winner, but as a player with the ability to impact the championship race (which, I don't care what anyone says, is a two-horser), he's clearly the better option. Sure people are currently liking the Bulls roster and how dangerous they can be, but anyone who picks them as a contender is just trying to be cute. Carmelo Anthony has the potential to bring you what Noah can't. End of discussion.

The 2010 Free Agents Summit

Somewere in Las Vegas, NV, 8:30pm

They said it wouldn't happen, but it did. And I got the official transcript. Here is the word-for-word account of the free agent summit that supposedly would never take place.

LeBron James: Ok, the official 2010 Free Agency Summit is now called to order.

Dwyane Wade: [COUGH COUGH COUGH] You really gotta do the chalk thing every time, LB?

LBJ: My bad, homie. Can you take role?

DWade: Yeah. My wife? Star Jones? Gabrielle Union?

LBJ: Whoa, whoa, wrong list, Flash.

DWade: Oh, oh, yeah, I see. Ahem. Chris Bosh?

Chris Bosh: Here.

DWade: Where?

Bosh: Here!

LBJ: He’s in my pocket. Been there since their season was over.

DWade: Oh….um…aight. Joe Johnson?

Joe Johnson: President.

LBJ: What?

DWade: Don’t…Joe’s a lil…slow.

Joe: Nuh-huh. I play point guard suhtime.

[Pause]

DWade: You know know, nobody say nothing. I’ll respond if I see you. Amare? Check. Boozer? Check. Dirk? Half-check. Ok, everybody’s here.

Ray Allen: Ray Allen, check.

LBJ: Ummm Ray, how’d you get in here without us hearing your knees? You don’t belong here.

Ray: Everybody in the room who’s ever hit 8 threes in an NBA Finals game, please raise your hand. Oh, wait, whose ONE hand is in the air? Is that MINE? The one with the RING? Looks like there’s only one of us who REALLY belongs here.

DWade: I got one, too. I just want another one.

LBJ: I think that’s why we’re all here.

Amare: Not me. I came close this year, but that doesn’t matter. I’m tired of competing. I want fame and fortune and a max contract. 

Carlos Boozer: You know you only got one knee, right?

Joe: And four eyes.

Amare: I don’t care! I’M A MAX PLAYER! WATCH! AH! AND 1!

Dirk Nowitzki: That wasn’t even a foul.

DWade: Fellas, fellas, fellas. We’re here to discuss destinations. With that said, I would like to point out that Miami is the hottest beach city in the country. Post-game is on South Beach and the women…maaaan, the women.

LBJ: Star Jones?

Boozer: What about the hurricanes?

Joe: Ummm Carlos, I think D is talking about NBA teams, not college.

[PAUSE]

Amare: I want to come to Miami, DWade.

DWade: Ummm, Boozer…the hurricanes aren’t that bad. The hurricane season is usually after the playoffs.

Bosh: What are playoffs?

DWade: It’s what you’ll play in every year if you join me in Miami!

Bosh: I’ll go if LeBron does.

LBJ: I don’t even know why you’re here, Booz. Whatever decision we come to, you’ll just change your mind later, anyway.

Ray: What about Chicago? Anybody want to continue Jordan’s legacy? They can afford two of us…

Dirk: But which two?

LBJ: DWade, it’s your hometown.

DWade: And Cleveland is yours.

LBJ: Point taken. How about New York?

Boozer: Nah, Mike D’Antoni doesn’t like me. Says I rebound too much.

Joe: He like me…my friends just told me I didn’t want to play in Phoenix no mo. They told me I wanted to play in Atlanta so I wouldn’t win as much and they could party at da Magic City. I went dur. Can yall believe there wasn’t a single magician?! I was pissed.

Amare: He’s cool with me, too. Told me I didn’t have to play defense or rebound.

Dirk: That’s not gonna win you anything, trust me. Hold on, my attorney is calling. My new girlfriend was just on America’s Most Wanted.

DWade: So Amare, you can go to New York. Joe you can join him, and it’ll be like that 2004 Suns team.

Dirk: Without Steve Nash.

DWade: Like I said, it’ll be nothing like that 2004 Suns team. Booz, Dirk and…Ray…we got Chicago and New Jersey and of course MIAMI.

Dirk: To be honest guys, I just came for the slut machines.

LBJ: You mean slot.

Dirk: What?! Fuckin English, this shit is confusing.

DWade: Bosh, come to Miami, man…it’s sunny. Since you cut your hair you don’t look like an Avatar got raped by the Predator so the women will love you.

Bosh: I want to play with Bronbron!

DWade: Dude, you a grown ass man in another nigga’s pocket. Y’all the same age!

Bosh: I know, but he LOOKS 45. He could easily pass for my coach.

Ray: I’m a witness.

Boozer: First hand.

LBJ: Fuck y’all. I’m going to play for Hov.

Boozer: I can get with that. But I think Utah might want to keep me.

Ray: You know Jersey isn’t in Manhattan, right?

Joe: It’s close, tho. We can hang out together. You been to Chuck E Cheese?

LBJ: I think I could play with Devin Harris, the big Lopez, and Bosh. That’s a SQUAD.

DWade: But it’s still Jersey. Some places just aren’t made to win. Y’all will put those uniforms on and all of a sudden everybody will start playing like Michael Beasley.

LBJ: Ouch, D…that was low.

DWade: Hey, it’s not a secret. But I do have a confession. Bron, Bosh…I had an injunction placed on both of you. Neither of you is ever allowed in New Jersey, Cleveland, Chicago, or New York again. You’re both coming to Miami.

LBJ: What? How did that happen?

DWade: I had Star draw it up after we had just—

Ray: Whoa! Stop right there. I don't want to hear about who's in your Fave 5. Those commercials are getting terrible, by the way. So I guess I’m gonna stay in Boston. Get old. Have to wear goggles and a knee brace every game…no offense, Stat.

Joe: Stat can play offense. I seent it.

LBJ: So that’s it? Me, DWade, and Bosh to Miami, Boozer back to Utah, Dirk never left, Ray stays in Boston, and Joe and Amare reunite in New York. So nobody’s going to Chicago or New Jersey? Damn, that sucks for them. DWade, let’s go work on some nicknames…

Ray: How about “none of us can shoot so it’s not going to work?” Or “Can we play with two balls?”

Joe: Pause.

LBJ: Ok, well...let’s go, fellas. And remember, we all have to pretend like we have no idea where we’re going. That’s how you get the good money.

DWade: Then, Bron, you might want to take Chris out your pocket. And let go of my hand.

LBJ: Oh, aight...sidekick.

DWade: Wait a minute...

LBJ: Meeting adjourned.

Arizona Passes Law Banning Ethnic Studies Courses

Dear Arizona Governor Jan Brewer,

I was writing you a critical letter about the bill you just signed prohibiting ethnic studies courses in Arizona public schools. I danced around racism, threw in some alliterations, even made a Mein Kampf reference, but no matter what I wrote, I still wasn’t conveying what I really felt. I couldn’t wrap enough reason in it. There was an infinite amount of logic (something that apparently can’t be found in the Arizona government). But I was really making a simple thing complicated.

Arizona bans ethnic studies...Seriously. >

I love my mother…sent her a Mother’s Day card and made sure to call. She’s a great woman. Looks amazing in red. Like, flamenco dancer red. I have two sisters. Love them to death, also. Even though none of them ever specifically taught me this lesson, my innate respect for women has stricken the b word from my vocabulary. Well, in most forms.

I still say that some ideas, concepts, or inanimate objects are, or can be, a “b” word. I still use it as a verb. One can “b” or be accused of “b”-ing.  I’ve been “b”ed at, and had days that were really a “b”. I’ve made a pun by using the “b” word in its true meaning, referring to a female canine species. But I’ll be doggone if I’ve never used it in reference to a policitian and his or her administration. With that, I say with all sincerity, honesty, truth, disdain, disrespect and condescension. Jan,

YOU'RE A BITCH.

Puta. Perra. Estupida.  Ignorante. The worst kind.

Yours Truly,

Me

P.S. Barack, can you believe this bitch? Not teaching ethnic studies?! Is she eyeing the Republican VP nomination in 2012? She makes your jumper look good.

Stay Tuned...

I know that the Phoenix Suns wore their "Los Suns" jerseys in protest. I have an opinion on that, too. It's coming soon.

Arizona Law Isn't Pointless, just un-"reasonable"

Dear President Obama,

I know you still running form that good ol’ southern a**-whoopin I’d give you on the court. You sneaked into and out of L.A. and never told me anything. That was a b***h move, Barack. But that’s not the issue right now. Been to Arizona lately? To just read my new opinion, jump down to the red bold "That's".

Man, it’s some stuff going on there, isn’t it? These people have passed a law that reads:

For any “lawful contact” made by law enforcement officials [what the hell does that mean? If there is a police officer involved, doesn’t that make it lawful? The only unlawful contact I can think of, R. Kelly got off. Pun intended…give me some credit here] “where a reasonable suspicion exists that a person is an alien” [what’s “reasonable”? The governor says that’s at the officer’s discretion…more on that later] “a reasonable attempt shall be made, when practicable, to determine the immigration status of the person.” [there’s that word “reasonable” again].

So many conservatives can’t understand why people are up in arms. Liberals are jumping too far to the left and thinking that Mexicans are about to start being jailed for not having two forms of identification. Both sides are wrong, but that should be okay because neither of them completely approves of the job you’re doing—which tells me you’re probably doing it right.

When looking solely at the letter of the law, the flaw is its gray area. I don’t know what qualifies as “lawful contact.” If I’m walking my imaginary dog and strike up a conversation with a passing officer…that’s lawful, right? If I don’t strike up a conversation, will I create “reasonable suspicion”?

When a television reporter asked Arizona Governor Jan Brewer to define “reasonable suspicion,” she passed on the opportunity, citing that that’s up to the officers on the street, saying they make decisions like that every day. That, she’s right about. Now let’s look at their track record.

In 2008, the ACLU of Arizona released the results of two years of research on the Arizona Department of Public Safety and racial profiling. The results, titled “Driving While Black or Brown”, concluded:

African Americans and Hispanics stopped by DPS officers were more likely than whites to be searched on major highways
 
On average, Native Americans stopped by DPS officers were 3.25 times more likely to be searched than whites stopped by DPS officers. African Americans and Hispanics were each 2.5 times more likely than whites to be searched by DPS.

Higher search rates for minorities were not justified by higher rates of transporting contraband.

Minorities, including African Americans, Hispanics and Middle Easterners, were consistently stopped for longer periods of time than whites traveling on all interstate highways in Arizona.

In sum, this report concludes that DPS officers treated persons from different racial and ethnic groups unequally between July 2006 and June 2007. Minorities were more likely than whites to be searched and stopped for longer periods of time. This unequal treatment was not justified by higher contraband seizure rates from minority motorists.

These are the results of a study on the same officers who will be using “reasonable suspicion” as a reason to ask someone to furnish proof of legal presence. Somehow, I just don’t trust it. And I don’t trust them to make a “reasonable attempt” to determine immigration status anymore than I trust that officers in the Rodney King beating used “reasonable force”.

Leaving police to decide what is “reasonable” will lead to injustice. Even if 95% of police officers are completely great people armed with nothing more than badges, halos and good intentions, seeking to protect the people, all it takes is that remaining 5% to make legal U.S. residents, citizens and visitors feel unequal or uncomfortable.

That’s the letter of the law. The spirit of the law has purpose. Illegal immigration is a problem for the southwestern states and there needs to be an effort to secure our borders. That’s where you come in, Chief. But that’s not the end of your role.

Immigration regulation and enforcement is a responsibility of the federal government, not a state right. I’ve seen that you have called for your administration to find a way to block the Arizona law. Thanks. But they shouldn’t have to look long. There’s your loophole. If this goes to the Supreme Court, the state of Arizona will lose. If immigration regulation was a state right, imagine the chaos it would create.

If Arizona keeps and enacts this law, what does that mean for the neighboring states of Nevada, California, New Mexico and even Texas? More immigrants — both legal and illegal. That would force those states to consider similar regulations or face substantial strains on their local governments, economies, and populations. That’s not fair to those states. So the federal government (that’s you) has to step in and make things level again which, in this case, clearly means killing the new law.

I sympathize with every Mexican American in Arizona. I wouldn’t want to be the test subject when one antiquated cop takes my presence as an opportunity to establish his definition of the term “reasonable.”

So the ball’s in your court, Air Force None. Shut ‘em down. Wait, if you can’t do that to me on the court, I’m sure you couldn’t do it to a whole state.

In order to maintain order in the Southwest and protect the rights and quality of life of individuals who have come to this country legally to build a better life, or were born within these borders just like you or I, do to the Arizona government one of the things you do best:

Smoke ‘em, Barack.